Day 5: 09/12/12

No good excuse why I didn't post yesterday other than I was tired and wanted to rest. So now that we have that cleared up. I had a lot of time yesterday to think. (Family went on a day vacation and lots of driving time) Why am I ashamed? Did I do anything wrong? Why is this something that controls me? This was one event in my life. Not something continual that is happening.

I know it seems like I ask the same questions of myself every damn day. But I don't its new way of thinking. It's new ways to hate myself. I honestly hate myself at this point. "I should have been stronger. I should have fraught back. I should have known better." Everyday I battle to get those thoughts out of my head. Ain't easy but I need to.

We are our own worse critic. We yell, beet up, and leave the worse scars on ourselves. We need to be able to take that in stride and try to shut up the voices in my head. They don't help all they do is make it worse on ourselves.

Fucking Perfect - P!nk

Thanks,
Suz